“I just want to relax.”

How many times have you answered this question: “What are your goals for today’s session?” with the statement above?

When a new Massage Mate books with me, I read through their completed health form looking for all the clues I can gather before we sit down to chat. Not only do I ask about anything they have marked regarding health conditions, but I also ask what brings them to my table that day. And I would be a very wealthy LMT if I had a nickel for every time someone has said to me, “I just want to relax.”

Relaxation opportunities and experiences are vast.  Think about all these questions:

How do you want to feel?

Recharged, exhilarated, refreshed, calmed, grounded, transformed?

What do you do to relax?

Nap?

Art?

Music?

Read?

Puzzles?

Exercise?

Can you see how there are infinite possibilities and combinations even within only a few of these choices? The same holds true for every integrative, customized massage.

In one recent tête-à-tête with a first time visitor (who booked a 2 hour session), I was struggling to lay the foundation from which I could build the treatment. Massage Mate had told me all about the areas where they carry tension and what kind of pressure they preferred, but I felt I was missing an important key to unlock what was going to feel good to them.

A cue I like to offer when I need more guidance is, “Do you like work that grips the tissue or do you like work that glides over and through?” So, I asked this question to MM, and got the answer that to me felt like the “Aha!” I needed.

They replied, “I like targeted work. Not {circular strokes with their hands}.” Ding, ding! Thank you. Now I can see we are hiking a mountain, not sitting pool-side on a lounger.

This session used gliding strokes merely as a means to spread the lubricant, warm the tissues, offer breaks from anything that might feel intense, and then signal an area was complete. I prioritized defining work that differentiated individual muscles, as well as addressed specific points of congestion, while using a mix of my fingertips (for precision), open palms (for exploration) and forearms (for diffusion). Everything came together, and Massage Mate rebooked before leaving.

Remember, you have infinite facets that make you unique. Your massage should reflect each one.